Matsuri's letter
by gaamatsu4dewin
Summary: I've said before that I would write this. I'm aware that it's been a while and I've kept you waiting, but I had to make sure it was perfect. Please favourite, review, and read my other stories if you haven't already done so.


Gaara-sama:

I know that most of the girls in the village have written you love letters, and that you're tired of reading them, so if you don't want to read this one, just toss it in the trash can under your desk. I won't be offended. In fact, I completely understand that you're busy with being Kazekage, and have no time for girls.

Before I go on, please know that I'm scared right now. But... I guess it's a good kind of scared, in a way.

That's silly, huh?

Whoever heard of a teenage girl who was afraid of romance?

But then, whoever heard of a girl who writes a love letter, and within the first paragraph tells the guy to throw it away? Not that you're still reading, of course. If you've gotten this far, I'm very flattered.

I must seem ridiculous to you now, writing like this.

I've wasted a few pages trying to get it just the way I want it, and this one still isn't quite right.

But I don't know that I'd ever have the courage to tell you in person. I'd be a stammering mess. I've always been shy around you.

I met you three years ago. Back then, I wouldn't have _dreamed_ of asking you to return my affections. It's not that I hated you. I've never even disliked you. I was just frightened of you. That's all.

I gradually grew out of that fear, as you trained and cared for me as a sensei ought to.

You've always been a kind and considerate friend.

You're probably either bored or shocked by reading this letter. If the former, I'm sorry I've inconvenienced you. If the latter, I'm sorry I've upset the delicate balance of your emotions. You hide it, but I know that deep down, you're very sensitive.

I'll just say it straight out, now. I've been avoiding it for too long.

Gaara, I...

I love you.

I love your smile, the way your pale green eyes light up when you're happy, the way your entire body resonates with energy and passion, and yet you're so still and quiet. I love the moments between us when we can share an emotion just by looking at each-other a certain way. I love your gentleness, your compassion, your genuine love for human-kind.

Oh, yeah, and... I love your hair color. I know it's girlish of me to say, but it's just so different and pretty. I have a weak spot for red-heads. You're really attractive, even if you deny it when the other girls gush about you.

I've loved you since forever ago, but it wasn't obvious to me until that blonde guy from the Akatsuki came and captured you.

I ran to your rescue with your siblings and some others from the village, but... it was too late.

You were dead.

I've never been so heartbroken in my life.

I knew I'd have to go back to Suna and live my life without you. No more long, hot days in the sun training vigorously, no more evenings on the roof of the Kazekage mansion watching the sunset and the stars, no more shy smiles after a timid, but honest compliment. I'd have to find a new shoulder to cry on, a different friend to give hugs to. You know how physically needy I am, since my parents died and I don't have a lot of friends who like hugging people.

I... I lost it in front of everyone, and cried a lot. I guess I should have been embarrassed, but I didn't care. I wanted people to know how much I loved you.

I felt so alone, in the midst of the crowd of Suna shinobi. I knew that I couldn't ever love another man as deeply as I love you.

But then Lady Chiyo brought you back. There was hope yet for me. I was relieved, ecstatic, knowing I could finally say how I felt.

And then, you opened your eyes and looked at that blond friend of yours. 'Uzumaki Naruto-kun', or something like that. I'll admit I was jealous for a moment.

I ran to you and asked after your health. You looked straight at me.

Your eyes...

So emotionally affected by the presence of so many people who cared for you.

I said earlier in this letter that we could always communicate without words, but this was on a whole different level than all of the other times. I swear I could sense that you knew I was in love with you just by the look in your eyes.

Please forgive me if I've misunderstood, but...

It seemed like you returned my feelings in that gaze.

Please tell me if I'm wrong. I don't want to disillusion myself and believe that you like me when the truth is that you only think of me as a friend. I won't be hurt, if that's the case.

I know that intimate discussions between friends make you nervous and scared, so... you don't even have to answer my confession, if you don't want to. I'll understand.

Matsuri


End file.
